Thursday, September 26, 2013

NFL Week 4 Picks

known associate:
starting of with a homer play for tnf. the rest to follow.
SF -3 at stl (2 nuts)
betting the value and trusting that the past 2+ seasons are more indicative of this niner team than the past 2 games. everyone and their momma seems to think the niners super suck but this is still one of the most stacked rosters in the league. and a team with that talent coming off 2 losses is always a good bet. in short, teams are never as good or bad as they seem. unless they're the rams. nah, really.. good balanced offenses give the niners trouble. that aint the rams. the only thing i dont like is that it's a thursday night road game. sorry for the scattered 2 minute write-up.
- niners 35 rams 11. +2 nuts.
NE +3 at atl (4 nuts)
- pats 30 falcons 23. +4 nuts
mia at NO -6.5 (2 nuts)
- fins 17 saints 38. +2 nuts.
lvh supercontest picks: sf-3 (w), ne+2.5(w), no-6.5(w), cle+4.5(w), chi+3(l)
- lvh results: 4-1
also played hou.
maybe phi, buf, oak.

Week 4: (3-0. +8 nuts)
Season: (7-4-1. 10 nuts)
LVH picks: 5-4-1

     Indented Servant
NYG @ KC -4 (3 nuts)
DAL - 2 @ SD (3 nuts)
WAS -3 @ OAK (3 nuts)

Week 4: (2-1, 3 nuts)
Season: (6-6, 5 nuts)

billy rubin:
i posted my picks on time last week, but i guess i did it at the same time as known associate or indented servant and mine got erased, so you'll just have to take me word for it.
SEA -1.5 @ HOU (3 nuts)
CHI +4 @DET (2 nuts)
TEN @ NYJ u40.5 (2 nuts)

Week 4: 1-2, -1 nut
Season: 5-7, -3 nuts 

Sunday, September 22, 2013

NFL Week 3 Picks

billy rubin: i'm on vacation this week and didn't get to finish my capping, so these picks are kinda from the seat of my pants.

BAL +1 vs HOU (3 nuts)
Rice is out, Pierce is in. Houston's overrated, Baltimore is probably underrated now. The End. 

StL @ DAL o47 (2 nuts)
I think each team's offense is better than the opposing defense, so points shouldn't be too hard to come by.

MIN -7 vs CLE (2 nuts)
This is just a gut play, but I have a hard time believing Cleveland's offense can keep them in this game.

Week 3: 1-2, -1 nut
Season: 4-5, -2 nuts

known associate:
SD +3 at ten (5 nuts)
- chargers 17 titans 20. push.
az at no OVER 48.5 (1 nut)
- cardinals 7 saints 30. -1 nut.
hou at BAL -1 (1 nut)
- texans 9 ravens 30. +1 nut.
lvh supercontest picks: sd+3(p), bal+2.5(w), pit+2.5(l), gb-2.5(l), nyg+1(l)
gonna make 5 picks a week for fucks.
- lvh results: 1-3-1

Week 3: (1-1-1, no nuts)
Season: (4-4-1, 2 nuts)
LVH picks: 1-3-1

     Indented Servant

CHI -2.5 @ PIT(3 nuts)
JAX +19 @ SEA(1 nuts)
BUF +2 @ NYJ(3 nuts) 

Week 3(1-2, -1 nut)
Season(4-5, 2 nuts) 

Saturday, September 14, 2013

NFL Week 2 Picks

     Indented Servant - All Road, All The Time Edition(2-1; 6 nuts)

NO -3 @ TB (5 nuts)
I'll bet this game all day.  For 5 nuts each time.  That's hella nuts if I bet that all day.  Like HELLA nuts.  More nuts than can I can count.  LeGarette Blunt is no longer in Tampa to punch the poo out of people's butts, so the Saints will easily cover this number - as easily as I will  be surrounded by nuts.

MIA +2 @ IND (3 nuts)
I'm going to keep wagering nuts on the Dolphins until they get caught in a tuna net and sold at a supermarket.  Mercury Morris approves this message*.
(*He does not.)

DET -1.5 @ ARI(2 nuts)
Detroit showed just how dynamic their offense can be after the addition of a dude that used to stick it to some famous chick.  If it were a dick length contest pitting this guy's dick length against the famous singer that was boning the famous girl in question, then I don't know if I would be so confident in betting nuts.  Good thing it's a football game.

Week 2: (1-2; -4 nuts)
Season: (3-3; 2 nuts)

billy rubin:

NO @ TB over 48 (5 nuts)
I'm putting lots of nuts on NO's offense being too good to TB's defense and NO's defense being too incompetent for even Josh Freeman. 

StL +5 @ ATL (2 nuts)
The battle for the letter t in the middle of your city's abbreviated name is on, son! I have this as a pretty close game, so I'm putting my nuts where my mouth is. 

MIN @ CHI over 41.5 (3 nuts)
Scoring will happen in this game and the total of the points scored will exceed 41.5. That is my prediction. 

Week 2: (1-2; -4 nuts)
Season: (3-3; -1 nuts)

known associate:
car at BUF +3.5 (4 nuts)
det at ARI +2 (2 nuts)
den at NYG +4.5 (3 nuts)

Week 2: (2-1; 3 nuts)
Season: (3-3; 2 nuts)

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

NFL Week 1 Picks

     formerly known as kNot Yore Type

MIA +1 @ CLE; 5 nuts
Dan Marino will be like "Uu huh." and Bernie Kosar will be like "No way." and Mark Duper will be like "Yes way." and Ozzie Newsome will be like "Nope." Larry Csonka and Jim Brown will run around. Then Cleveland will try to move to Baltimore, only to discover that they had moved there previously.  Then LeBron James will show off his championships.  And Bone, but 2 Live Crew.  So Miami, +1.

SEA @ CAR + 3.5; 2 nuts
Going on the road, to the east coast, to start the season?  That is a tough assignment.  Seattle's DBs may wish that they could play some Fantasy Movie Casting so they could add Errol Flynn.   Anyone?  Anyone???  
 The Waterhabitatingbirdsofprey may eek one out, and if they do, it will be by the slimmest of margins.  I can see Carolina winning this straight up because Seattle may not be able to sustain their energy level throughout the entire game, unless Starbucks shows up with some greenie-enhanced coffee. 

KC -3.5 @ JAX; 3 nuts
Alex Smith will Joe Montana the Chiefs to an at least two score victory.  Steve Bono and Elvis Grbac will read this and think they are better than Alex Smith.  Alex Smith will laugh.  He is way smarter than those two guys.  

(2-1; 6 nuts)

billy rubin says:

CAR +3.5 vs SEA; 2 nuts
What he said, plus Seattle's D is hurt and suspended. But Ron Rivera, though. 

AZ +4 @ StL; 2 nuts
Unless the Rams get really creative with Tavon Austin and catch the Cardinals off guard, I think this one goes to the birds straight up like Paula Abdul. 

GB @ SF over 49; 3 nuts
 This is the Packers' Super Bowl and the Niners D is as fresh and healthy as it will be all year, so there's risk with this, but there's just too much talent at the skill positions on both teams for this one to be a low scoring affair. 

(2-1; 3 nuts)

known associate's half-ass researched plays:
sea at CAR +3.5 (2 nuts)
oak at IND -11 (2 nuts)
tb at nyj UNDER 40 (3 nuts)
i prefer first half bets for both side plays, hope defensive scores don't push the total over.
3-0 for my wallet as i only played the 1H sides.
but (1-2. -1 nut)