Sunday, November 25, 2012

NFL Week 12 PIcks

billy rubin:
browns +2 (3 nuts)
ravens pk (2 nuts)
packers +3 (2 nuts)

2-1, +3 nuts

known associate:
PIT -1 at cle (3 nuts)
the steeler d always steps up when big ben is out and old man batch is an upgrade over gimpy leftwich.
- steelers 14 browns 20. -3 nuts.
so maybe d'donte wasn't an upgrade over the gimp. or maybe he was. we'll never know because the steelers (mostly running backs) fumbled the ball 6 times. the browns scored 17 points off turnovers yet only won by 4 points.
atl at TB +1 (3 nuts)
the 9-1 falcons should really be about 6-3 and might be looking ahead to their thursday night matchup against the rival saints. they also can't stop the run. and matt ryan is super gay.
- falcons 24 bucs 23. push.
i still think the falcons should be 7-3, at best. though, their run defense acquitted itself nicely (for 1 game, at least). and they're finally giving jacquizz more touches.
bal at SD pk (3 nuts)
this game doesn't mean much to a ravens team traveling cross country while it's a must win for the chargers.
- ravens 16 chargers 13 (ot). -3 nuts.
fuck this game. the ravens clearly didnt give a shit but the chargers still managed to squander a 10 point 4th quarter lead; with the last 3 points coming after a 4th and 29 (!) conversion on a desperation checkdown. even worse, ray rice probably didnt gain the necessary yardage. upon review, they ruled that his knee was down at the 35 yard line and marked the ball at the 33.5 yard line. that's a distance of 4.5 feet. there is no way there could be 4.5 feet between rice's knee and his arms. that dude is 5'7"! shit like this makes me wanna quit betting on the NFL. not that i will or anything.

also playin over in indy, titans, raiders, dolphins.
and i'll be on the rams. ryan lindley is favored. that's stupid.
i like the saints but fear the harbaugh-calypse.
lean pack.
week 12: 0-2-1, -6 nuts.

BUF @ IND -2 (3 nuts)
SEA -3 @ MIA (3 nuts)
ATL -1 @ TB (2 nuts)

records through week 11:
known associate: 16-16-1. +2 nuts (last week: 2-1, +1 nut)
billy rubin: 12-20-1, -20 nuts (last week: 2-1, +3 nuts)
not your type 19-14, +14 nuts

Saturday, November 24, 2012

College Football Week 13 Picks

unrelated, fade these...
STANFORD -2.5 at ucla (2 nuts)
the ducks are pounding the beavers so this is a must win for the trees while the bruins are in a letdown spot after toppling the trojans. stanford d-line should dominate.
- cardinal 35 bruins 17. +2 nuts.
TEASE texas a&m -16.5/usc +11.5 (1 nut)
word is billy walters is on the aggies.
- tigers 29 aggies 59/irish 22 trojans 13. +1 nut.
louisiana tech at san jose state OVER 76 (1 nut)
- bulldogs 43 spartans 52. +1 nut.
week 13: 3-0. +4 nuts.

2012 NCAA Record through week 12:
known associate: 16-17-1. -10 nuts (week 11: 0-1, -2 nuts)
Blue Whale: 1-5. -12 nuts

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Week 11 (Dick) Pic(k)s

This season is so fun so far! This week promises to bring more fun for everyone, something like the Dayman, ah-aaah!

billy rubin:

i don't know how much time i'll have to devote to research and projections, so i'm going to start early with thursday night football.

MIA +3 @ BUF (3 nuts): i'm pretty sure ryan tannehill is more handsome than ryan fitzpatrick so the buffalo LBs and DBs will alternately be blushing and all boned up when they see tannehill in his tight sexy football pants with his augmented dick protector cup bulge. in my honest opinion, that will be the difference in this game - the bills defense playing with boners because of the handsomeness of the dolphins qb. not to take anything away from fitzpatrick though, because i've heard that he has a reputation for having a giant penis and some of the dolphins defenders might get caught thinking about fitzpatrick's big ol' penis on a play action and lose track of cj spiller, who, i presume, is also well endowed in his crotch. basically, it all comes down to penises, per usual. put your money on that!
CLE +7.5 @ DAL (3 nuts): Surely, Trent Richardson has a big penis, and Tony Romo must have a small one, which is why he's always got a new girlfriend - can't keep them satisfied. Plus, Dez Bryant is too busy working on his doctorate to learn his routes. Reverse Cowboy all day!
SD +7.5 @ DEN (3 nuts): Peyton Manning might have the face of a horse, but I doubt that extends to the rest of his anatomy. Philip Rivers didn't get his last name by not being a prolific ejaculator. The luck of the Irish will not be with Willis McGahee this week.

2-1, +3 nuts

known associate:
gb at det OVER 52 (4 nuts)
rodgers and stafford indoors against banged up defenses.
bal at PIT +3.5 (3 nuts)
last play came down to cards, pats, raiders, panthers, or...
CLE +7 at dal (2 nuts)

TB -1.5 @ CAR (4 nuts)
CLE +7 @ DAL (3 nuts)
JAX +15 @ HOU (3 nuts)

records through week 10:
known associate: 14-15-1. +1 nut (last week: 2-1, +3 nuts)
nyt: 16-14, +4 nuts
billy rubin: 10-19-1, -23 nuts (last week: 0-3, -7 nuts)

Saturday, November 17, 2012

College Football Week 12 Picks

congrats buster.
known associate:
tennessee at vanderbilt OVER 60 (2 nuts)
will probably be on the trees too.
- vols 18 commodores 41. -2 nuts.
bleh. trees shocked it though.

2012 NCAA Record through week 11:
known associate: 16-16-1. -8 nuts (week 10: 1-2, -2 nuts)
Blue Whale: 1-5. -12 nuts

Sunday, November 11, 2012

NFL Week 10 PIcks: akaFRANK Edition

known associate:
i'm looking at 4 dogs (panthers, titans, bengals and saints) but will wait til the a.m. to lock in any plays as i'm expecting favorable line moves.
denver at CAROLINA +3.5 (3 nuts)
- broncos 36 panthers 14. -3 nuts.
new york giants at CINCINNATI +4 (3 nuts)
- giants 13 bengals 31. +3 nuts.
TENNESSEE +7 at miami (3 nuts)
- titans 37 dolphins 3. +3 nuts.
also playin saints.
- week 10: 2-1, +3 nuts.

Not Your Type
SD @ TB -3 (3 nuts)
DEN -3.5 @ CAR (3 nuts)
OAK @ BAL -7.5 (3 nuts)
3-0, +9 nuts

billy rubin:
i didn't really get to do too much research or analysis this week, and clearly not before any of the morning games, so here goes nothing:
NYJ @ SEA o38.5 (3 nuts)
StL @ SF u37.5 (2 nuts)
SF -13 vs StL (2 nuts) - my projections actually have the rams covering, but screw it, i'm a niner fan (until they start playing games in lowly santa clara)

0-3, -7 nuts

records through week 9:
known associate: 12-14-1. -2 nuts (last week:1-2, -3 nuts)
nyt: 13-14, - 5 nuts
billy rubin: 10-19-1, -16 nuts (last week: 1-1-1, +1 nut)

Saturday, November 3, 2012

NFL Week 9 PIcks

billy rubin:

The NFL has been an enigma to me this year and I anticipate Week 9 being no different. There are a couple early games I like, so I figure I'll get those on here tonight and add my third pick sometime tomorrow.

mia @ ind u43 (3 nuts): miami's a pretty good d going against a good, but still young and inexperienced QB. indy is a bad defense going against a pretty bad offense. i am hoping those particular matchups sufficiently suppress scoring on sunday. alliteration!

bal @ cle u44.5 (3 nuts): the ravens have a good offense, but cleveland has a surprisingly good defense. cleveland's offense has shown signs this year and baltimore's defense is far from elite these days, but i think this should be a tight game with tons of non-scoring fo dat ass.

buf @ hou o47.5 (2 nuts)

1-1-1, +1 nut

known associate:
buffalo at houston OVER 47.5 (3 nuts)
BUFFALO +11 at houston (3 nuts)
- bills 9 texans 21. -6 nuts.
miami at indianapolis UNDER 44 (3 nuts)
- dolphins 20 colts 23. +3 nuts.
had a hard time narrowing down my picks this week. i also like (in order) ravens, cowboys, over in jersey, over in nawlins, panthers... over in atl, steelers... bengals, over in dc.
- week 9 results: 1-2. -3 nuts.

not your type:
MIA @ IND +1.5 (3 nuts)
DET -5.5 @ JAX (3 nuts)
TB +1.5 @ OAK (4 nuts)
3-0, +10 nuts

records through week 8:
known associate: 11-12-1. +1 nut (last week:1-2, -3 nuts)
nyt: 10-14, -15 nuts
billy rubin: 9-15, -17 nuts (last week: 2-1, +3 nuts)

Friday, November 2, 2012

College Football Week 10 Picks

skipped week 9 due to baseball.
known associate:
washington at CALIFORNIA -4 (1 nut)
sorry, couldn't resist.
- huskies 21 golden bears 13. -1 nut.
should've resisted.
was at CAL -2.5 2H (1 nut)
- huskies 14 golden bears 6. -1 nut.
not really sure how cal didn't cover either of these plays. oh wait, that's right.. zack maynard.
ALABAMA -7 at lsu (2 nuts)
- tide 21 tigers 17. -2 nuts.
oregon at usc OVER 71 (2 nuts)
- ducks 62 trojans 51. +2 nuts.
week 10 results: 1-3. -2 nuts.

2012 NCAA Record through week 8:
known associate: 15-14-1. -6 nuts (week 8: 2-2, +1 nut)
Blue Whale: 1-5. -12 nuts