NFL Week 7

known associate:
ne at NYJ +3.5 (3 nuts)
- pats 27 jets 30. +3 nuts
sd at JAC +7.5 (3 nuts)
- chargers 24 jags 6. -3 nuts
den at IND +6 (3 nuts)
- broncos 33 colts 39. +3 nuts
lvh supercontest picks: nyj +4(w), jac +7.5(l), hou +6.5(w), ind +6.5(w), phi-3(l)
- lvh results: 3-2

Week 7: (2-1. +3 nuts)
Season: (12-8-1. 16 nuts)
LVH picks: 14-10-1

     Indented Servant
CLE +9 @ GB  (2 nuts)
DEN @ IND +6.5 (2 nuts)
MIN @ NYG -3.5 (3 nuts)

billy rubin:
these are late, but i texted known associate before the games started so they're legit.
CHI -1 @ WAS (2 nuts)
BUF +7 @ MIA (4 nuts)
CAR -7 vs. StL (4 nuts)

Week 7: 2-1, +6 nuts
Season: 9-12, -3 nuts 

NFL Week 6

Billy Rubin:
gb at BAL +2.5 (4 nuts)
NO +1.5 at ne (4 nuts)
WAS +5.5 at dal (2 nuts)

Week 6: 1-2, -4 nuts
Season: 7-11, -9 nuts

known associate:
gb at BAL +2.5 (5 nuts)
- pack 19 ravens 17. +5 nuts
det at CLE +2.5 (2 nuts)
- lions 31 browns 17. -2 nuts 
CAR +2.5 at min (2 nuts)
- panthers 35 vikes 10. +2 nuts
lvh supercontest picks: bal +2.5(w), cle +2.5(l), car +2.5(w), buf +7(w), was +5.5(l)
- lvh results: 3-2

Week 6: (2-1. +5 nuts)
Season: (10-7-1. 13 nuts)
LVH picks: 11-8-1


     Indented Servant

I don't know what happened to the picks I posted this morning.  There may have been two of us working on the blog at the same time.  But here is what I had - I swear!

NO +1.5 @ NE (4 nuts)
IND -2 @ SD (2 nuts)
OAK @  KC -7.5(3 nuts)

Week 6: (1-2, -3 nuts)
Season: (9-9, 3 nuts)

College Football Picks

i'll start this off like a square and play what will be the most watched game of the weekend...

9/13...
ALABAMA -8 at texas a&m (3 nuts)
johnny football and his boys walked out of tuscaloosa with an upset victory last season. they should at least be able to keep it within a TD at home, right? i don't think so. 'bama was in a tough spot, coming off an emotional last second defeat of rival LSU. after spotting the aggies a 20-0 lead, the crimson tide got their shit together to make a game out of it, eventually losing by 5, 29-24. this year, there will be no let down as the crimson tide are coming off their bye week with revenge on their minds and a whole offseason for saban to devise ways to stop manzeill. not that they already hadn't after making in-game adjustments the first time around. also, a&m's defense has regressed. i say 'bama by 2 TDs.
- Crimson Tide 49, Aggies 42 (-3 nuts)
started off looking like a bad bet, then an easy cover, only to get backdoored at the very end.

other ncaa thoughts:
i like watching teddy bridgewater throw but it would be nice if his recievers weren't always open by 5 yards. Blue Whale says FSU's jameis winston is the new quarterblack to watch. i will.
speaking of FSU, and watching...



adding:
wisconsin at ARIZONA ST -5.5 (2 nuts)
- badgers 30, sun devils 32 (-2 nuts)

10/10...
rutgers at louisville OVER 56 (2 nuts)
semi degenerate, semi value play.

2013 NCAA record through 10/9: 0-2 (-5 nuts)

NFL Week 5

     Indented Servant
KC -3 @ TEN( 2 nuts)
Barry Word is bond, son.
SEA @ IND +3 (3 nuts)
Seattle has been living a charmed life on the  road so far this season, so the roll has to come to an end, right?
CAR -2 @ ARI (4 nuts)
Cam Newton will discover that Fig Newton, Juice Newton, and the Neutron Dance are not related to him.  In other news, there will be  an American football game between the Carolina and Arizona clubs in which one will emerge victorious.  Well played, sirs, well played!  Oh yeah, Carolina by a nose - a three point nose.

Week 5: (2-1, 1 nut)
Season: (8-7, 6 nuts)

billy rubin:
BAL +2.5 @ MIA (3 nuts)
PHI @ NYG -1 (2 nuts)
CAR -2.5 @ AZ (3 nuts)

Week 5: 1-2, -3 nuts
Season: 6-9, -5 nuts 

known associate:
BAL +2.5 at mia (3 nuts)
- ravens 26 fins 23. +3 nuts
NE -1.5 at cin (3 nuts)
- pats 6 cats 13. -3 nuts.
phi at NYG +1 (2 nuts)
- eagles 26 football giants 21. -2 nuts
lvh supercontest picks: ne+2(l), bal+3(w), gb-7(w), sf-6.5(w), nyg+1(l)
- lvh results: 3-2
also under in ari, over in gb, and maybe dal, jac.

Week 5: (1-2. -2 nuts)
Season: (8-6-1. 8 nuts)
LVH picks: 8-6-1

NFL Week 4 Picks

known associate:
starting of with a homer play for tnf. the rest to follow.
SF -3 at stl (2 nuts)
betting the value and trusting that the past 2+ seasons are more indicative of this niner team than the past 2 games. everyone and their momma seems to think the niners super suck but this is still one of the most stacked rosters in the league. and a team with that talent coming off 2 losses is always a good bet. in short, teams are never as good or bad as they seem. unless they're the rams. nah, really.. good balanced offenses give the niners trouble. that aint the rams. the only thing i dont like is that it's a thursday night road game. sorry for the scattered 2 minute write-up.
- niners 35 rams 11. +2 nuts.
NE +3 at atl (4 nuts)
- pats 30 falcons 23. +4 nuts
mia at NO -6.5 (2 nuts)
- fins 17 saints 38. +2 nuts.
lvh supercontest picks: sf-3 (w), ne+2.5(w), no-6.5(w), cle+4.5(w), chi+3(l)
- lvh results: 4-1
also played hou.
maybe phi, buf, oak.

Week 4: (3-0. +8 nuts)
Season: (7-4-1. 10 nuts)
LVH picks: 5-4-1


     Indented Servant
NYG @ KC -4 (3 nuts)
DAL - 2 @ SD (3 nuts)
WAS -3 @ OAK (3 nuts)

Week 4: (2-1, 3 nuts)
Season: (6-6, 5 nuts)

billy rubin:
i posted my picks on time last week, but i guess i did it at the same time as known associate or indented servant and mine got erased, so you'll just have to take me word for it.
SEA -1.5 @ HOU (3 nuts)
CHI +4 @DET (2 nuts)
TEN @ NYJ u40.5 (2 nuts)

Week 4: 1-2, -1 nut
Season: 5-7, -3 nuts 

NFL Week 3 Picks

billy rubin: i'm on vacation this week and didn't get to finish my capping, so these picks are kinda from the seat of my pants.

BAL +1 vs HOU (3 nuts)
Rice is out, Pierce is in. Houston's overrated, Baltimore is probably underrated now. The End. 

StL @ DAL o47 (2 nuts)
I think each team's offense is better than the opposing defense, so points shouldn't be too hard to come by.

MIN -7 vs CLE (2 nuts)
This is just a gut play, but I have a hard time believing Cleveland's offense can keep them in this game.

Week 3: 1-2, -1 nut
Season: 4-5, -2 nuts




known associate:
SD +3 at ten (5 nuts)
- chargers 17 titans 20. push.
az at no OVER 48.5 (1 nut)
- cardinals 7 saints 30. -1 nut.
hou at BAL -1 (1 nut)
- texans 9 ravens 30. +1 nut.
lvh supercontest picks: sd+3(p), bal+2.5(w), pit+2.5(l), gb-2.5(l), nyg+1(l)
gonna make 5 picks a week for fucks.
- lvh results: 1-3-1

Week 3: (1-1-1, no nuts)
Season: (4-4-1, 2 nuts)
LVH picks: 1-3-1


     Indented Servant

CHI -2.5 @ PIT(3 nuts)
JAX +19 @ SEA(1 nuts)
BUF +2 @ NYJ(3 nuts) 

Week 3(1-2, -1 nut)
Season(4-5, 2 nuts) 

NFL Week 2 Picks

     Indented Servant - All Road, All The Time Edition(2-1; 6 nuts)

NO -3 @ TB (5 nuts)
I'll bet this game all day.  For 5 nuts each time.  That's hella nuts if I bet that all day.  Like HELLA nuts.  More nuts than can I can count.  LeGarette Blunt is no longer in Tampa to punch the poo out of people's butts, so the Saints will easily cover this number - as easily as I will  be surrounded by nuts.

MIA +2 @ IND (3 nuts)
I'm going to keep wagering nuts on the Dolphins until they get caught in a tuna net and sold at a supermarket.  Mercury Morris approves this message*.
(*He does not.)

DET -1.5 @ ARI(2 nuts)
Detroit showed just how dynamic their offense can be after the addition of a dude that used to stick it to some famous chick.  If it were a dick length contest pitting this guy's dick length against the famous singer that was boning the famous girl in question, then I don't know if I would be so confident in betting nuts.  Good thing it's a football game.

Week 2: (1-2; -4 nuts)
Season: (3-3; 2 nuts)

 
billy rubin:

NO @ TB over 48 (5 nuts)
I'm putting lots of nuts on NO's offense being too good to TB's defense and NO's defense being too incompetent for even Josh Freeman. 

StL +5 @ ATL (2 nuts)
The battle for the letter t in the middle of your city's abbreviated name is on, son! I have this as a pretty close game, so I'm putting my nuts where my mouth is. 

MIN @ CHI over 41.5 (3 nuts)
Scoring will happen in this game and the total of the points scored will exceed 41.5. That is my prediction. 

Week 2: (1-2; -4 nuts)
Season: (3-3; -1 nuts)


known associate:
car at BUF +3.5 (4 nuts)
det at ARI +2 (2 nuts)
den at NYG +4.5 (3 nuts)

Week 2: (2-1; 3 nuts)
Season: (3-3; 2 nuts)

NFL Week 1 Picks

     formerly known as kNot Yore Type

MIA +1 @ CLE; 5 nuts
Dan Marino will be like "Uu huh." and Bernie Kosar will be like "No way." and Mark Duper will be like "Yes way." and Ozzie Newsome will be like "Nope." Larry Csonka and Jim Brown will run around. Then Cleveland will try to move to Baltimore, only to discover that they had moved there previously.  Then LeBron James will show off his championships.  And Bone, but 2 Live Crew.  So Miami, +1.

SEA @ CAR + 3.5; 2 nuts
Going on the road, to the east coast, to start the season?  That is a tough assignment.  Seattle's DBs may wish that they could play some Fantasy Movie Casting so they could add Errol Flynn.   Anyone?  Anyone???  
 The Waterhabitatingbirdsofprey may eek one out, and if they do, it will be by the slimmest of margins.  I can see Carolina winning this straight up because Seattle may not be able to sustain their energy level throughout the entire game, unless Starbucks shows up with some greenie-enhanced coffee. 

KC -3.5 @ JAX; 3 nuts
Alex Smith will Joe Montana the Chiefs to an at least two score victory.  Steve Bono and Elvis Grbac will read this and think they are better than Alex Smith.  Alex Smith will laugh.  He is way smarter than those two guys.  

(2-1; 6 nuts)

billy rubin says:

CAR +3.5 vs SEA; 2 nuts
What he said, plus Seattle's D is hurt and suspended. But Ron Rivera, though. 

AZ +4 @ StL; 2 nuts
Unless the Rams get really creative with Tavon Austin and catch the Cardinals off guard, I think this one goes to the birds straight up like Paula Abdul. 

GB @ SF over 49; 3 nuts
 This is the Packers' Super Bowl and the Niners D is as fresh and healthy as it will be all year, so there's risk with this, but there's just too much talent at the skill positions on both teams for this one to be a low scoring affair. 

(2-1; 3 nuts)



known associate's half-ass researched plays:
sea at CAR +3.5 (2 nuts)
oak at IND -11 (2 nuts)
tb at nyj UNDER 40 (3 nuts)
i prefer first half bets for both side plays, hope defensive scores don't push the total over.
3-0 for my wallet as i only played the 1H sides.
but (1-2. -1 nut)

My Favorite Albums of 2012

While it's already 2013, the new year is less than a week old, so I think it's still reasonable to talk about my favorite albums from the year that just ended. In terms of new music, I listened to rap almost exclusively in 2012, so that's what dominates this list. Here are my favorite albums from the past year in no particular order.

A$AP Mob, Lord$ Never Worry: It seems that you either love or hate A$AP Rocky. Personally, I enjoy most of the songs he's released thus far, regardless of the fact that he basically swagger-jacked Houston rap. But Rocky isn't the reason I loved this tape - A$AP Ferg is, which I've made no secret about. This tape didn't make any of the year-end lists I've seen and Fergie doesn't seem to be too critically acclaimed, but I'll be damned if his crazy raps aren't fresh to me.

Chief Keef, Finally Rich: This one totally surprised me. I loved "I Don't Like" and Keef's song with Fat Trel, but I wasn't sure how a full album of Chief Keef would be. Turns out it's pretty fucking great. And it's probably even better if you're on drugs, but I wouldn't know for sure. You definitely won't improve your IQ by listening to this though.

Van Halen, A Different Kind of Truth: Some people I know who are more rabid Van Halen fans than me and more knowledgable about rock didn't like this album at all. Sure, Diamond Dave has lost some range and some of the music is decades old and Michael Anthony and his falsetto are nowhere to be found, but anytime the brothers Van Halen and David Lee Roth make new music and it's not terrible, I'll eat it up. Maybe my ear isn't too discerning, but I listened to this album again this past week and it's still enjoyable to me, so it's presence on this list isn't merely for nostalgia sake.

Frank Ocean, channel ORANGE: Nothing I can say about this album that hasn't been said better elsewhere. This was basically the soundtrack to my summer. The music was much more exciting than anything I did.

Waka Flocka Flame, Salute Me Or Shoot Me 4: This is what Triple F Life should've been: a bunch of hard ass beats and yelling. I'm glad Waka still has this type of music in him. This shit knocks in the car too, and makes you drive with greater abandon, which isn't really a good thing. Be careful.

Cousin Fik, Sickest N***a Healthy: I just found out about this album within the last month and this and Chief Keef are pretty much all I've been listening to since then. I've always liked Fik and I really enjoyed his Hacksaw Ben Thuggin album from 2011. I'm not quite sure how Sickest and his Tonight Show tape came out this year and I missed them until recently, but I'm glad I finally found out about them.

I probably could've thrown on Roach Gigz for Bugged Out and iamsu! for either KILT or the more recent $uzy 6 $peed, but as much as liked those albums I didn't bump them that much last year.

So that's about it. I'm hoping I can add the new Tegan and Sara album to the 2013 version of this list.

NFL Playoffs, Round 1

NYT

CIN +4 @ HOU
I know I'm posting a bit late on this one, but it's not like there's 1 second left in the 4th quarter with Cincy up by a point.  I like the Bengals, mostly because I don't like Houston today.

MIN +9.5 @ GB
I don't know if they can beat the Packers two weeks in a row, but that is a lot of points.

IND +7 @ BAL
I'm going to beat all the headlines and call it the Colts' "Luck-y Day".

SEA @ WAS +3
All underdogs this week.  Subway sandwiches on RGIII after this one.

billy rubin:

good thing i missed the early game because i totally would've chosen the bengals.

MIN +11 @ GB (3 nuts): i also benefit from the announcement that ponder is out. joe webb isn't much of a traditional qb, but i think he might do just enough to flumox the packers and make this less than an 11-point win for green bay. that's all i'm looking for here.

IND +7 @ BAL (2 nuts): indy's been doing it with smoke and mirrors all season and that can't go on forever, but the ravens aren't the ravens of yore. all it takes is some joe flacco-ness and a big play from ty hilton to keep this close enough for indy to cover.

SEA -3 @ MIN (3 nuts): battle of the quarterblacks. i'm partial to al b brees myself, but that's no knock on greasy 3000. the best unit in this game is the seattle defense, but seattle has been a far inferior team on the road, although they've had some good road games late in the season. nonetheless, betting on them to win by more than 3 in washington is probably foolish, but my season is lost already so i'm just going to roll with what my projections say.

known associate:
ind at bal OVER 47 (2 nuts)
arians's absence is a bit concerning (given his familiarity with the ravens d) so i knocked off a nut. both Ds are bullcaca though. the greatest murderer linebacker of all-time will help mentally, not so much physically. i think his buddy ed reed can have a bigger impact against andrew luck and his league high (by my count) 22 adjusted interceptions.
sea at WAS +3 (3 nuts)
everyone's sucking seacock but russell wilson will come up... short. skins control with their run game.
sea at was UNDER 23 first half (2 nuts)
run that clock.

College Bowl Picks Part Two

known associate:
1.1.13
hny bitch.
NORTHWESTERN -1 vs miss st at jac, fl (3 nuts)
the 9-3 wildcats could've been in a better bowl, blowing 4h quarter leads in all 3 losses. they'll be amply motivated for their first bowl win since 1948.
more in the morn if my ass wakes up.
lean wolverines, under and under in capital one bowl (aka citrus bowl) for the other morn games.
nwu vs msu UNDER 55 (1 nut)
- wildcats 34 bulldogs 20. +4 nuts.
tease PURDUE +24.5/OVER 62 vs oklahoma st at cotton bowl (1 nut)
- boilermakers 14 cowboys 58. -1 nut. not close.
nebraska vs georgia UNDER 31 first half at citrus bowl (1 nut)
- cornhuskers 24 bulldogs 23. -1 nut.
nebraska vs georgia UNDER 33.5 second half (1 nut)
- cornhuskers 7 bulldogs 22 (31-45 final). +1 nut.
MICHIGAN +4.5 vs south carolina at tampa, fl (1 nut)
mich vs sc UNDER 24 second half (1 nut)
- wolverines 15 cocks 12 (28-33 final). -2 nuts. 
lost both bets on that td in the final seconds. fuckin cocks coulda just kicked a fg. great game though.
jadeveon clowney, überbeast, right after bullcaca officials "misread" a measurement, giving michigan the ball on downs:

tease WISCONSIN +11/UNDER 54.5 vs stanford at rose bowl (1 nut)
wisc vs stan UNDER 23.5 first half (2 nuts)
- badgers 14 cardinal 17 (14-20 final). -1 nut. 
tease hit. shouldn't have pussed out of the 2h under chase.
niu vs fsu UNDER 28.5 first half at orange bowl (1 nut)
- huskies 3 seminoles 14 (10-31 final). +1 nut.
5-5, +1 nut to start off the year.
1.2
LOUISVILLE +14.5 vs florida at superdome (1 nut)
gators have superior players but the cardinals have the best individual talent in teddy bridgewater. sprinkled a tiny bit on first half +7.5 over parlay.
lou vs fla UNDER 24.5 second half (1 nut)
- cardinals 33 gators 23 (9-13 second half).  +2 nuts.
teddy bridgewater is my latest quarterblack mancrush.
1.3
ksu vs ou UNDER 38 first half at glendale, az (2 nuts)
and Blue Whale won't like this but...
KANSAS STATE +9 vs oregon (1 nut)
- wildcats 17 ducks 35 (10-22 first half). +1 nut.
cats fucked it up with poor clock management at the end of the 1st half. actually, they probably fucked up from the get by kicking it to de'anthony thomas to start the game. smh.
1.4
texas a&m vs OKLAHOMA +3.5 at cowboys stadium (1 nut)
tease OU +10.5/over 66 (1 nut)
- aggies 41 sooners 13. -2 nuts.
johnny football is the white rg3 (and bridgewater is the black andrew luck). 
1.5
pittsburgh vs mississippi UNDER 27 second half at birmingham, al (1 nut)
- panthers 7 rebels 14 (17-38 final). +1 nut.
i'll be playing this bowl under system next season.
1.6
arkansas st vs KENT ST +3 a mobile, al (1 nut)
- red wolves 17 golden flashes 13. - 1 nut.
1.7
ALABAMA -9.5 vs notre dame at miami, fl (3 nuts)
tease ALABAMA -2.5/OVER 33.5 (1 nut)
tide pull away in the second half (at the latest).
- crimson tide 42 fighting irish 14. +4 nuts.
sabanism defeats catholicism.
young yeldon's been an impact player from game one but fellow frosh amari cooper was even more impressive in this game. let's hope next year's "title" game brings the tide a more formidable opponent. it should be the ducks but don't count out the aggies, buckeyes or even the cardinals (plural) and my nig teddy bridgewater.

2012 NCAA final bowl record:
known associate: 18-15. +6 nuts.

2012 NCAA final regular season record:
known associate: 19-17-1. -6 nuts
Blue Whale: 1-5. -12 nuts.

NFL Week 17 Picks

NYT

NYJ @ BUF -3.5 (2 nuts)
CLE +10 @ PIT (3 nuts)
GB @ MIN +3 (3 nuts)

known associate's wtf happened last night picks:
seriously, i feel like i did some hard drugs. 99% sure i didnt.
DAL +3 at was (3 nuts)
gb at MIN +3 (3 nuts)
gb at min OVER 45.5 (2 nuts)
locked in the over in new orleans last night. would've been a pick. also playin pats 1h.
lean cards too.

billy rubin:
dal at WAS -3 (5 nuts)
dal at was OVER 48.5 (5 nuts)

College Bowl Picks Part One

known associate:
starting this off with a degenerate special play for the div III championship!
12.14
st. thomas vs MOUNT UNION -18.5 at salem, va (1 nut)
- tommies 10 purple raiders 28. -1 nut.
degenerate special indeed. and why the fuck was the new mexico bowl at 10am, on a saturday, with only one other bowl game scheduled?
back later this week with more plays...
12.21
ball state vs central florida OVER 59.5 (1 nut)
tease BALL ST +14.5/OVER 52.5 (1 nut)
0-2, -2 nuts.
12.26
CENTRAL MICHIGAN +7 vs western kentucky at detroit (1 nut)
chippewas finished the season stronger and are playing in their home state.
- chippewas 24 hilltoppers 21. +1 nut.
also gonna play this under system in spots. long layoffs lead to rusty offenses while the second half chase provides decent insurance. just small for today's matchup though.
- 2nd half under hit.
12.27
lean under for noon. will take 2h if it's a play.
cincinnati vs DUKE +10 at charlotte (3 nuts)
the pass-happy blue devils are playing their first bowl game in 17 years, led by a 5th year head coach and redshirt senior QB. the bearcats are playing their 4th bowl game in 5 years; without their head coach. they've also surrendered 502 yards per game to the only 2 decent passing teams they've faced this season (syracuse and lousville). cincy is more talented but all other signs point to a motivated duke team pulling off an upset in their home state. these ladies ain't helping though:

lean over for the evening but damn that total is awfully high.
- bearcats 48 blue devils 34. -3 nuts.
this really was the worst beat ever. devils were at the cats 5 with 1:30 to go in a tie game yet somehow lose... by 14! shit like this can't be rigged.
12.28
ohio vs LA MONROE -7 at shreveport, la (1 nut)
the bobcats don't match up well with the warhawks on either side of the ball; lacking both the vertical threat to expose ULM's shaky secondary and the requisite speed in their own defensive backfield to slow down kolton browning and his deep receiving corps. warhawks are also playing in their first bowl game, ever, and in their home state. weather is a concern but i'm posting this now in case i sleep through kickoff. might add a nut in the morn if i don't.
- bobcats 45 warhawks 14. -1 nut.
my match up analysis was on point... except for the opposite teams. no idea how the warhawks beat arkansas and hung with auburn and baylor.
lean tech, two times.
rutgers vs VIRGINIA TECH PK at orlando, fl (1 nut)
taking beamer and his bowl experienced boys over a rutgers team that just choked away it's chance at school history (and a bcs bowl).
- scarlet knights 10 hokies 13. +1 nut.
i thought this bet was dead after rutgers' fluke (and only) td started the scoring. logan thomas isn't an nfl qb.
minnesota vs TEXAS TECH -13 at houston, tx (1 nut)
fade it.
- golden gophers 31 red raiders 34. -1 nut.
told you.
12.29
west virginia vs SYRACUSE +4 at yankee stadium (2 nuts)
- mountaineers 14 orange 38. +2 nuts.
wvu vs syr UNDER 35 first half (1 nut)
doubt geno smith and his boys want to play in the snow (or wintry mix).
- mountaineers 7 orange 12. +1 nut.
tease ARIZONA STATE -6.5/OVER 47.5 vs navy at at&t park (1 nut)
navy is outmanned and under-motivated (after their big win vs army).
lean beavers and spartans.
- midshipmen 28 sun devils 62. +1 nut
12.31
georgia tech vs usc UNDER 31.5 first half at windy el paso, tx (1 nut)
- yellowjackets 7 trojans 7 (7-21 final). +1 nut
CLEMSON +6 vs lsu at georgia dome (1 nut)
- tigers 25 tigers 24. +1 nut

2012 NCAA bowl record (through 12.31):
known associate: 7-6. no nuts

2012 NCAA regular season record:
known associate: 19-17-1. -6 nuts
Blue Whale: 1-5. -12 nuts

NFL Week 16 Picks

known associate:
locking two plays in...
no at dal OVER 52 (3 nuts)
the cowboys offense has been better of late and getting demarco back to top form should only help. more importantly, the saints rank 30th in red zone conversion defense (% of TDs allowed) and they're at their worst on the road; allowing a touchdown 72% of the time. brees should get his.
was at phi OVER 45 (3 nuts)
both teams are pretty shitty defensively in the red zone; ranking 26th or worse. reid and foles have nothing to lose and could be motivated to put on a show in their last home game of 2012. weather shouldn't be a factor.
the giants are probably going to be my third play. also considering browns, the unders in gb and nyj, and the over in seattle.
NYG -2 at bal (1 nut)

billy rubin:
PIT -3 vs CIN (3 nuts)
DAL -3 vs NO (3 nuts)
CHI -7 @ AZ (3 nuts)

NYT

IND -5.5 @ KC (3 nuts)
NO +2.5 @ DAL (3 nuts)
STL +3 @ TB (3 nuts)


records through week 15:
known associate: 17-26-2, -21 nuts (week 15: 0-3, -7 nuts)
nyt: 23-21-1, +9 nuts

NFL Week 15 Picks

NYT

CAR +3 @SD (4 nuts)
TB @ NO -3.5 (2 nuts)
CHI @ GB over 43.5 (2 nuts)

billy rubin:

TB +3.5 vs. NO (2 nuts): yikes, going against NYT again. oh well, josh freeman is a 6'6" black man and drew brees is a 6'0" (listed) white man. advantage (in the pants), freeman.
DEN @ BAL o48 (3 nuts): manning should be good for the lion's share of this and hopefully cam cameron was actually holding back the ravens offense.
IND +10.5 @ HOU (2 nuts): indy isn't nearly as good a team as their record would indicate, and houston should be out to prove something, but i just can't see this being a two score game. over is probably the smarter play for this game, but i just wrote two whole sentences so fuck it.

known associate:
NYG +1 at atl (3 nuts)
- giants 0 falcons 34. -3 nuts
everyone's favorite gay qb and his boytoys played their only complete game of the season but i'm still not buying the falcons as a top superbowl contender. "statement game" my butthole. more like an outlier game.
JAC +7.5 at mia (2 nuts)
- jaguars 3 dolphins 24. -2 nuts
not that i deserved to win this play but this score is a bit misleading. the jags hung with the fins (leading in yardage for most of the game) but turned it over on downs in the redzone three times! also, the final td came very late in game. lol @me for layin nuts on shit teams.
PIT +1 at dal (2 nuts)
- steelers 24 cowboys 27 (ot). -2 nuts
reverse cowboys were 0-6 ats at jerryland this season. i shoulda layed off this game tho. steelers d is aging quick.
also played broncos for 2 nuts.
lol @jim caldwell. i'm far from a cam cameron apologist but it looks like the ravens made a bad situation worse. check caldwell's resume. pretty sure dude has never called plays, ever. he did get outcoached by sean payton in the superbowl tho.
bucs, panthers, bills, niners, texans 1h for lesser nuts.
panthers were the play, bills and bucs are some assclowns on defense. texans really didn't deserve to cover the 1h or the game. go niners tho!
week 15: 0-3, -7 nuts. 


records through week 14:
known associate: 17-23-2, -14 nuts (week 14 1-2 -2 nuts)
21 -20-1, +5 nuts

Get Off My Lawn!! - The Rantings of An Old Man

As the elder statesman of the contributors to this blog, I feel it is my calling to complain about things that draw my ire.  My latest target: NBC's Take It All.  This shit makes me want to send my foot back in time to when these episodes were recorded to kick everyone involved with it in the dick(or equivalent) while the part of me stuck in the present seethes.

more to come...maybe.

NFL Week 14 Picks

NYT

BAL +2.5 @ WAS (2 nuts)
TEN @ IND -5 (3 nuts)
DAL @ CIN -3.5 (3 nuts)


known associate:
atl at CAR +3.5 (3 nuts) straight up win
NO +4.5 at nyg (3 nuts) loss
DET +6.5 at gb (2 nuts) half point loss
titans nearly made the cut.
titans either covered or pushed depending on your line.
smaller plays on pats, browns, skins, jags, eagles.
pats killed. browns covered. skins covered and rg3 threw an incompletion that was more exciting to watch than 99% of alex smith's completions. jags miss cecil shorts, didn't cover. eagles won straight up as dogs.
week 14: 1-2, -2 nuts.

billy rubin:

TEN +5.5 @ IND (2 nuts): i hate to go against not your type, who clearly has the football gods' ears this season, but this weekend is full of crappy games/lines and this is one of the few that stands out to me as a play.
CIN - 3.5 vs DAL (4 nuts): now i'm a little worried about the fact that NYT and i agree on this. hopefully andy dalton employs reverse racism and treats the cowboys like red-headed stepchildren. or just reverse cowboys someone and gets some ball-to-ball action. matt ryan would probably like that.
PHI +7.5 @ TB (2 nuts): i'm not too sure about riding the nick foles train for two weeks in a row, especially in a contest where he likely has the smaller penis between the starting qbs, but all the eagles have to do is lose by only a td. it's not like this is the tampa defense of yore anyway.

records through week 13:
known associate: 16-21-2, -12 nuts
nyt : 21-17-1, +13 nuts

NFL Week 13 Picks

Not Your Type

IND +6 @ DET (3 nuts)
JAX +6.5 @ BUF (2 nuts)
TB @ DEN -7.5 (4 nuts)

And here is a rant:  I think Harry Wofford from Comcast Sports/NBC is a big-ass bag of dicks.  The dude is totally full of shit, yet doesn't know shit.  In a market full of dick-hole broadcasters, he takes the cake(which happens to be in the shape of a dick enveloping another dick).

known associate:
JAC +6.5 at buf (4 nuts)
ind at DET -6 (2 nuts)
cin at SD +1 (2 nuts)

billy rubin:
JAX +6 @ BUG (3 nuts): uh-oh, three of us are in agreement. that is either really good or really bad. chad henne is handsome and justin blackmon has a big dick though, so we should be good. but i seem to recall underestimating ryan fitzpatrick's handsomeness before...
PHI +10 @ DAL (2 nuts): the eagles are crappy, but so are the cowboys. while murray may be back, 10 points is a big nut to cover and all nick foles has to do is avoid be awful. plus dez bryant is a still a genius, a big ol' giant dicked genius.
WAS +3 vs NYG (2 nuts): greasy 3000 definitely has a bigger dick that horse face, jr. 'nuff said.

records through week 12:
billy rubin: 14-21-1, -17 nuts (last week: 2-1, +3 nuts)
nyt: 20-15-1, +14 nuts

NFL Week 12 PIcks

billy rubin:
browns +2 (3 nuts)
ravens pk (2 nuts)
packers +3 (2 nuts)

2-1, +3 nuts

known associate:
PIT -1 at cle (3 nuts)
the steeler d always steps up when big ben is out and old man batch is an upgrade over gimpy leftwich.
- steelers 14 browns 20. -3 nuts.
so maybe d'donte wasn't an upgrade over the gimp. or maybe he was. we'll never know because the steelers (mostly running backs) fumbled the ball 6 times. the browns scored 17 points off turnovers yet only won by 4 points.
atl at TB +1 (3 nuts)
the 9-1 falcons should really be about 6-3 and might be looking ahead to their thursday night matchup against the rival saints. they also can't stop the run. and matt ryan is super gay.
- falcons 24 bucs 23. push.
i still think the falcons should be 7-3, at best. though, their run defense acquitted itself nicely (for 1 game, at least). and they're finally giving jacquizz more touches.
bal at SD pk (3 nuts)
this game doesn't mean much to a ravens team traveling cross country while it's a must win for the chargers.
- ravens 16 chargers 13 (ot). -3 nuts.
fuck this game. the ravens clearly didnt give a shit but the chargers still managed to squander a 10 point 4th quarter lead; with the last 3 points coming after a 4th and 29 (!) conversion on a desperation checkdown. even worse, ray rice probably didnt gain the necessary yardage. upon review, they ruled that his knee was down at the 35 yard line and marked the ball at the 33.5 yard line. that's a distance of 4.5 feet. there is no way there could be 4.5 feet between rice's knee and his arms. that dude is 5'7"! shit like this makes me wanna quit betting on the NFL. not that i will or anything.

also playin over in indy, titans, raiders, dolphins.
and i'll be on the rams. ryan lindley is favored. that's stupid.
i like the saints but fear the harbaugh-calypse.
lean pack.
week 12: 0-2-1, -6 nuts.

nyt:
BUF @ IND -2 (3 nuts)
SEA -3 @ MIA (3 nuts)
ATL -1 @ TB (2 nuts)


records through week 11:
known associate: 16-16-1. +2 nuts (last week: 2-1, +1 nut)
billy rubin: 12-20-1, -20 nuts (last week: 2-1, +3 nuts)
not your type 19-14, +14 nuts

College Football Week 13 Picks

unrelated, fade these...
STANFORD -2.5 at ucla (2 nuts)
the ducks are pounding the beavers so this is a must win for the trees while the bruins are in a letdown spot after toppling the trojans. stanford d-line should dominate.
- cardinal 35 bruins 17. +2 nuts.
TEASE texas a&m -16.5/usc +11.5 (1 nut)
word is billy walters is on the aggies.
- tigers 29 aggies 59/irish 22 trojans 13. +1 nut.
louisiana tech at san jose state OVER 76 (1 nut)
- bulldogs 43 spartans 52. +1 nut.
week 13: 3-0. +4 nuts.

2012 NCAA Record through week 12:
known associate: 16-17-1. -10 nuts (week 11: 0-1, -2 nuts)
Blue Whale: 1-5. -12 nuts